Stories from young adults raised in non-traditional “families”

By Barbara Gauthier

It was just a matter of time before young adults raised in “non-traditional families” told their stories and the pictures they paint are not pretty. Below you will find four such stories.

The first is by Robert Oscar Lopez, an English professor at California State University — Northridge. He describes his life growing up with his lesbian mother and her romantic partner and the social and sexual confusion that resulted. He was a social outcast in school because his mothers were unable to teach him the appropriate social language for a young man. When he got to college, he was hit on by any number of gay men because he was unwittingly sending out the social signals of being a feminized male. These “friends” convinced him that he was gay and encouraged him to embrace his homosexuality. Several years later he began to find himself unexpectedly attracted to women. He decided to leave his gay/bisexual past behind, got married and became a father. He has been a faithful husband to his wife and a loving dad to his children ever since.

The second narrative comes from a young woman who was raised by her gay dad and his various partners. She too was a social outcast because her peers with heterosexual parents learned “all the unwritten rules of decorum and body language in their homes; they understood what was appropriate to say in certain settings and what wasn’t; they learned both traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine social mechanisms.” What she learned from her dad instead was “explicit sexual speech, self-indulgent lifestyles, varied GLBT subcultures and gay vacation spots.” Now an adult, Dawn Stefanowich has testified before the Canadian Senate of Legal and Constitutional Affairs on the dangers of using children to legitimize the experimental social restructuring of gay marriage. She also provides some excellent advice to young people who have grown up as she did to help them get past the psychological and emotional damage that was done to them in the name of political correctness.

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